To start off, this list is by no means the cookie-cutter way of how to tell if a guy is into you (or not). This list is instead based on my own personal experience. Every man is different and will show varying signs. I firmly believe this list will show you at least a couple insights on what to look for. Next time you are out with your man crush, consider these 10 things to help you determine if he is into you.
Check his body language
This might be an obvious one for most of you, but body language can say a lot about someone in any given interaction. Look for things like his arm placement or posture. Crossed arms across the chest usually mean he is defensive or uncertain. That being said, maybe he just trying to flex his pipes and show off. The difference between the two are usually pretty obvious.
Ideally, in most cases, he should be leaning towards you and without his arms crossed against his chest.
Does he maintain eye contact
Another great way to tell if a guy is into you is his ability to maintain consistent eye contact. It is often a sign he is listening to your conversation. He may also be trying to read your expressions, or even admiring your appearance.
Lack of eye contact is often associated with a lack of interest. In other words, he is interested in something else. It could be his phone or even another person.
Acting nervous or anxious
I struggled with being nervous and anxious in my early dating years. I would get so nervous that my palms would start sweating, my knees were weak, and arms were heavy (sorry of the Eminem reference). But seriously… If he is showing signs of nervousness, you may think he lacks confidence, but that may not be the case.
Looking back at my own experiences, any time I was really nervous around a girl, it was someone I really liked. I wasn’t shy around every girl, so for a guy, it’s easy to tell which ones just get to you. From the other side, if he is showing nervousness, he is probably giving himself very high expectations to impress you.
Willing to hang out with you, anywhere, anytime
I remember when I used to drop everything and anything just to hang out with a girl I liked. Especially with my wife, Brittany. When we first met, I found any reason to have to hang out with her.
A quick little story with Brittany and myself… Before I share my experience, it was Brit who was willing to hang out (regardless of the circumstances). Although, I still think it is relevant from a guy’s perspective.
One time I was sick right after we met for the first time. It didn’t stop Brit from wanting to hang out, even though I had a nasty virus that is very easily spread (i.e. stay home). We didn’t do anything extravagant but considering we literally just met, that didn’t stop us. Ask yourself if you would hang out with someone you barely know and has some sort of viral illness. I know 9 out of 10 times I would say, “24 hours after antibiotics!” But I am pretty thankful and fortunate that Brit didn’t care so much.
The compliments start flowing in
Compliments are always a kind gesture, no matter what your relationship/status is with an individual. A guy will typically point out certain things about you that he likes or appreciates. Compliments can be hard for guys, as they often don’t know what to say or how to say it. Do we compliment the hair, the outfit, the purse? Sometimes we just don’t know what to say and often won’t share anything unless it goes beyond the compliment itself. So if a guy does compliment you, that’s a pretty good sign.
This is something that I need to improve as I do not frequently compliment Brit anymore. It’s not because I think any less of her since we first started dating, but rather a sense of being ‘too comfortable’. Learn from me and don’t ease up on the compliments. Something small often goes a long way.
Brit, you are the most beautiful wife I could have ever dreamed of (inside and out). What I love most about you are your selflessness and family-oriented mentality. Your boys (me and Scooby) often come first, and we appreciate that. Love you lots!
Teases you frequently
Continuing the list of how to tell if a guy is into you is, teasing. It is kind of similar to the complimenting mentioned above. A guy typically won’t go out of his way to tease a girl unless there is some sort of further meaning to it. We aren’t teasing to be mean, but instead to get a reaction out of you. Try and think about a time where a guy teased you. You may have giggled and asked him to stop embarrassingly. Maybe you blushed, and your cheeks were as red as tomatoes. Guys don’t tease to make you feel bad, we do it to make you smile or laugh. If you only show embarrassment, we think it’s cute.
Asks personal questions
If a guy likes you, he is going to be invested in getting to know more about you. Personal questions around family, friends and your general past are likely to come up. Let’s be honest, if a guy isn’t asking questions about you, does he really seem interested? Probably not.
Another quick little story about Brittany and myself. It only took a few days to learn each other’s backstories, including our childhood and family. We related to each other so much more than we expected, it created this ‘I got to know more’ sort of vibe between us.
Does he spend money on you
This is a quick and easy one. Not to say that a guy HAS to spend money on you. But you have to realize, we are not going to waste our hard-earned cash on someone we don’t enjoy being around.
One time I had an awkward date where I really didn’t feel a connection with her. She didn’t seem like an awful person by any means, but I didn’t see any chemistry. We had gone out for dinner and eventually, the waitress had asked if we wanted one or two bills. I had thought to myself to ‘be the man’ and just pay for it, but I slowly glanced at my date to gauge her thoughts. She instantly welcomed me with a ‘doesn’t matter to me’ but with an almost sarcastic smile. I just got the vibe that she was really assuming and hoping I was going to cover the night, and so I did.
In this case, I spent my hard-earned money, but the key here is I didn’t tell the waitress right away that I would take one bill. But that brings me to my point. If a man offers to pay for the bill without hesitation, you are set.
Phone usage is minimal around you
This is a big one to determine if a guy is into you. Nowadays, this is so much more relevant than ever. Practically everyone you know has a smartphone. We got internet access, games, social media, texting, all at our fingertips. When you go on your phone to scroll through social media or play a game, you are likely bored. Or you have a few minutes to spare and don’t really have anything better to do at that moment. If a man is on his phone consistently throughout the time he is with you, he is likely bored or not interested. Imagine yourself on a first date with a dude, and he is texting someone else all night. You wonder to yourself, what the heck is he doing on his phone. I can almost guarantee he is texting his bud or, worse, another girl.
He is there for you, physically and emotionally
For all my friend zoned men out there, this one is for you. The number one way to tell if a guy really likes you is that he is going to be there for you. Comedian by day, a therapist by night. He’s going to want to make you laugh. He is going to want to make you feel safe around him. If you are laughing, then we think you must be happy. If you are happy, we are delighted. But if you are sad, so are we. Guys often share emotions based on how you are feeling. A guy who really cares for you will do whatever he can to make sure you are always happy. If you have a problem, he would want you to feel like you can trust him. If there is a problem, he is going to listen.
That pretty much covers my top 10 ways on how to tell if a guy is into you. Again, this is more so based on my own experiences and may differ in almost every interaction. Guys think girls are complicated, but guys can be complicated too. Either way, I hope you find this list helpful. If you did, please feel free to comment below how this has helped. I would really like to hear from you. If you disagree with anything, the comment section is also open for discussion.
If you have a request on what you would like me to share on my next post (or would like me to answer a question), please feel free to contact me directly through our contact page.
Also, if you want to check out what Brittany is sharing, you can check out all of her posts here.